Lily had grown up in the big city. Noise, car horns, dirty air, people going this way, people going that way, someone hurrying, another seemingly not so much, everything was moving at high speed. She graduated from music school with honors and was preparing to apply to the music academy in order to continue with singing. She was in love with it; it had become her second nature. Her mother discovered her talent by chance at a Christmas celebration when she was singing “Silent Night, Holy Night.” After that her life began to flow at high speed. She had time for almost nothing. Going to solfeggio, to piano, and to school, and little time remained for her to play with the children in the neighborhood.
When she grew a little older, she went out with girlfriends, but was forever stretched on a cross between the musical career and the normal life of the people around her. After school she was accepted into the youth choir at the national radio, so she acquired quite a decent income for her age. She felt good. One day, someone called after her in the street when she was going toward the radio for rehearsals.
– Lily, Lily!
She turned around. It was a classmate of hers from the early grades, now grown into a man, already taller than her. She stopped and they began talking. Although they did not have much time, she liked the conversation. She felt liked and at ease with her old acquaintance.
– Listen, – he said – if you want, we could see each other sometime?
She agreed, with the condition in her own mind that it was something without commitment. The meetings with Itso continued for more than half a year. His parents turned out to be Protestants and tried to take her to their church, but she did not feel any particular desire. She refused them several times, until all the excuses ran out and she thought that she would already offend Itso if she did not go. “What is the big deal?” she thought, “This does not commit me to anything.”
That Sunday morning, instead of lying around in bed, she had to get up (what a nuisance!) and dress as if going out. She arrived more or less on time and everyone was singing some songs unknown to her, which praised the god, instead of, as she was used to—the beloved. The man at the lectern spoke for a long time about things that, generally speaking, although she had heard of them, she did not understand. Toward the end, however, that same man told everyone to give a donation while they were singing to the god. This seemed very ugly to her. She decided that she did not want to see this man at the pulpit anymore, nor to come to this church anymore. But how not to offend her boyfriend’s family, she did not know.
The following year she was accepted with an excellent result on the exam at the music academy. She was preparing to spend five years in deep study while continuing to sing in order to have a livelihood. Her time decreased so much that she could barely find time for those close to her, even for Itso. She avoided going to his home; she did not want any more invitations to churches. The five years at the music university passed quickly: She found work at the opera, they had tours during the summer, and she often went abroad.
She was in a hotel in Southern Italy on one of their tours, and while sitting on her bed, she reached into the bedside cabinet and there found a new testament. Since she did not feel pressured by anyone to do anything, she began to read from a random place. The story was about a servant who buried his talent in the ground and it ended tragically for that person.
She put down the book, looked through the open window into nothingness, and thought about what this talent was. And if this was music, then she had a talent that had been given to her by the god to sing, or what? She continued to read carefully again and again the same place, until she discovered the bankers and then understood that it was about money. She understood that it was a comparison, not a real story. Then suddenly she realized that she had no idea what her talent was. That which had been entrusted to her by the god to do during her life. The peace from the peaceful and comfortable life disappeared without a trace. And whether she had lost priceless time while she had sung and sung and sung, she did not know how to find out. She thought of calling Itso, to ask him, but imagined the dozens of invitations to go to church and gave up. She told herself that there had to be some other way to understand whether, if, perhaps, and so on.
The tour was already coming to an end. A young couple were standing in the street near her hotel and talking with an elderly lady in a wheelchair. The young people looked like a married couple and spoke with fervor about their faith in the god. She stopped at a distance and listened, because she knew the language well. The young man saw her, smiled, and invited her to come closer. The elderly woman thanked them for the attention and left.
Lily stayed and told them about her problem with the church and with the talent. The girl introduced herself as Catalina and began to explain to her how the god had not told Christians to make churches, but to believe in Jesus and love one another. Lily thought that she had seen nothing of love in Itso’s church, as she called it. They went and ate pizza in a local pizzeria, then walked along the seafront while little by little she managed to understand the message of the young family. But even though she understood that the god is everywhere and she could find him anywhere, there remained what they called a prayer of repentance. They agreed to meet later, gave her a telephone number, and parted.
In the evening after the concert she was talking on the phone with Itso and told him about the young family. Itso did not like the idea that one might not go to church and somehow became angry that she was talking with some people who could be anything. Lily, however, for some reason trusted the young couple rather than the church that collected money during a holy song.
On the next day, she picked up the phone and arranged with Bruno and Catalina to meet at noon.
Lily stayed after the end of the tour, when the others left, and was there for another two months until the beginning of the new season at the opera. Itso did not seem very enthusiastic about this. When Lily returned, she was already a different person. She had been baptized in the sea, spoke in some tongues, explained that all of us together are the church of the god. Itso did not like the new Lily and their relationship cooled.
For the New Year holidays Bruno and Catalina came to her city. They did not understand the local language and she accompanied them everywhere. One day she introduced them to Itso; they spoke in English. Itso left very angry; he was convinced that without a church it could not be done, and that was that. Lily was somehow divided. She called her mother. She was not a very spiritual person, rather agnostically inclined, but advised her daughter:
– You listen to your heart, what it tells you. Itso may be right for himself, and you for yourself.
Her mother's advice was so-so, but it gave her a little freedom to think soberly about the situation. After the young Italians left, she opened the Bible and began to read with the hope of understanding what to do. By the opera season, she had managed to read the whole Bible and, as if by a miracle, the tour was again in Southern Italy.
She went gladly; singing no longer impressed her as much as when she was fifteen. Itso was also glad that she was reading the Bible, but was offended that she did not want to come to church. Bruno and Catalina already had a baby, and caring for him took much time from both parents, but also brought them much joy. When Lily called them again with her foreign accent, they were sincerely delighted and invited her into their home. Together they began to read the Bible and pray. Thus the summer passed.
Lily’s life was cut off so sharply, suddenly, as if without reason. Her airplane crashed during landing. Few survived. Itso could not believe it and his heart tormented him because he had not prayed more for Lily or because he had not managed to convince her to come to church. Lily stood before the throne of grace. Absolute peace and joy reigned everywhere. Jesus stood up, came near her, embraced her, and said:
– Lily, your life on earth is over and I receive you into my kingdom. You may remain forever.
Lily was so grateful that she had not been rejected despite her lukewarm life toward the god. However, she noticed in the lord’s tone that he had some proposal for her.
– If you want, – said the lord – I can return you to the earth so that you may be my witness. But you must choose now.
Lily stood before the lord with her head lowered and her whole empty life passed before her eyes. She wondered, if she returned to the earth, how she would be useful to anyone. The lord took her by the shoulders, looked her in the eyes and said to her:
– Lily, I can give you everything so that you may be my witness.
After that he sat on the throne and waited. She had the feeling that a whole eternity had passed. She was torn by the thought of remaining with her savior and of going to bear witness to her parents, to colleagues, and to everyone.
– I will go, she said.
– Go – she was told.
Lily found herself in the icy morgue, covered with a sheet in the middle of the night. It was cold and the smell of corpses and chemicals was everywhere. She got up, wrapped herself in the sheet, and started walking.
Her miraculous return from the dead became a sensation everywhere. The press talked about her. She became famous. Although she told everyone about her meeting with the god, either they did not believe her or simply ignored such news. She became discouraged. She remembered Bruno and Catalina and spoke with them. They were at the height of their happiness to hear the happy ending of her story. Itso, although he was glad, continued to claim that she had crashed because she had not been coming to church. Lily decided to remain with Bruno and his wife as long as “They put up with me,” she told herself.
She found work in the same pizzeria where they had met for the first time. They prayed, sought the god, and waited for his will. Their son grew and became a wonderful little boy with great faith in his heart. When she was free, she helped them in raising little Giordano. Thus not a few years passed and Lily still bore witness about her meeting with Jesus.
One evening, he came while she was sleeping and said to her:
– Lily.
– Yes, lord.
– It is time.
– Time for what, Jesus?
– It is time for your talent to bear fruit.
She knelt before him, he stroked her head and said:
– Daughter, go to Africa and serve the Africans. They are waiting for you.
When the Lord told her this, she was about forty years old, alone, without children, without a husband, only with the god. She left for Senegal. She tried to draw close to the different Christian missions there, but they demanded loyalty to their organization, or turned into enemies. Lily did not give up, although she had no income. Bruno and Catalina sometimes sent money. Several people who heard her testimony believed and trusted her that she had been sent by the god to help them.
When she was forty-five, the miracles began to happen. People came, were saved, received the holy spirit, and grew in faith. Lily never called herself their leader, nor did she ever ask them for money. They often brought her some fruit, or something else, and she always managed to be fed, clothed, with her rent paid. That same year, she married a local man from Senegal. They had several children. Lily always kept in touch with Bruno and Catalina. When Giordano grew up, he began to come to aunt Lily, as he called her. When her life was nearing its end, Giordano came and remained permanently with her, and he took care of the assembly.
Lily passed from this world at seventy-five years of age with great joy to meet her savior. Now, she knew that she had not buried her talent and was going to give account to her lord.